Can you even forgive cheating? Infidelity is one of the most painful events that can happen, especially to a woman. But either gender can feel totally betrayed. However, you should know that most couples don’t break up when there’s been a single act of infidelity. it is possible to come back into a place of love and come back into relationship through the art of forgiveness. research has shown actually there are three things you can do to help minimize the effects of infidelity and help you grow stronger as a couple.

Don’t avoid professional help

The first is if you can seek professional help, it’s so much easier when you have an observe an observing eye of a therapist there or a counselor who can help the two of you communicate what’s been going on. I always say, you know an affair isn’t the problem in a relationship it’s a symptom of the problem and spending some time talking to a therapist can help you understand what was going on with your partner.

Don’t overreact

Secondly, research shows that partners who minimize the event actually do better at getting over the cheating. That means they think of it as, oh, that was a one time thing, he really didn’t mean it. It was just physical or it was on ten things. She didn’t mean it. it was just physical, whatever you need to say to convince yourself. But instead if you think, oh, they’ve been cheating their whole life, they must be lying about everything if they lie about this. their whole character is flawed forever. if you start to have those thoughts. you’ll have less chance of getting over it. um finally you have to fight the feeling of being a victim in couple’s conflict. it’s been shown that when one couple or one partners constantly feels like they’re the victim, why me and always with the defenses. i’m trying as hard as i can. it’s hard for me, you know, and why did you do this to me if you stay in a place of feeling like a victim, it gives the other person a really difficult time to come back to you as a partner. they’re always going to feel like they’re the devil and carnett who did something bad to you and they’ll never be able to get solid with you again. So it’s really important that you bolster yourself andnd say i am not a victim. this didn’t happen to me. this is an obstacle that has shown up in our relationship and let’s find a way to solve it.

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