What to do if you caught your partner cheating and he lies about it. I must tell you that I have a lot of empathy and compassion for what you are going through trust. Is one of the pillars of a healthy relationship. And if you’re deal with a man who is cheating or lying to you, it can bring instability to every aspect of your life. So the first advice that I have for you is that you must accept your feelings. Don’t try to suppress the pain. Don’t try to just look away and not deal with what has happened.

Don’t hide your emotions

It is ok for you to be sad. It is ok for you to be hurt and it is ok for you to be upset because of what you’ve gone through and if he or someone else is telling you otherwise, it is important for you to distance yourself until you can fully cope and recover. The second advice that I have for you is that it’s important for you not to seek revenge when we are hurt by someone we love, we often lose control or we want them to feel the pain that we are feeling inside. And seeking revenge will never bring you long term joy, satisfaction or stability. You don’t want to create more damage and you don’t want someone else’s negative actions to impact your character. Stay true to who you are to your core beliefs and to your values and don’t try to hurt him because he hurt. The third piece of advice that I have for you is to keep the kids and the family out of the fight. It is very, very tempting to ask other people for their opinion or to share your pain with other people around you. What I’ve seen is that when you start to involve family members or friends or your children in your relationship drama, it starts to take a whole different life of its own.

Healing after infidelity

And it’s going to be a lot harder for you to heal and rebuild. It is best for you to deal with this in the appropriate ways with your partner. It doesn’t mean that you cannot communicate to anyone. Of course, you need to feel supported but don’t bring other people in the drama do so in a constructive way, reach out to a coach or to a therapist or to one close friend or confidant so that you can basically share your feelings but without backbiting without trying to denigrate your husband’s. At the end of the day. I’ve seen many people either blame their husbands continuously or blame themselves for their cheating. And it’s important for you to separate yourself from the cheating that has occurred a bad decision. Does not have to reflect. The character and integrity of this person for life. And you yourself cannot make or take full responsibility for someone else’s shortcomings. And that’s very important for you to really understand but also accept in a fundamental deep way. Finally, it is important to give each other time and space to heal and to rebuild. It is very difficult to get over cheating. Instantly overnight it takes time. You must give him the opportunity to regain and to earn your trusts. You must give him the time and the opportunity to earn and to fight for your trust, it is not your responsibility to fight alone, to try to make this marriage work. He needs to take accountability and he needs to be invested in trying to rebuild a new and improved relationship that is going to be based on trustworthiness. And if he’s willing to leave you for this other person. I highly, highly encourage you not to chase not to be desperate and not to compete with this other woman. Otherwise you will lose self respect, you will lose your power and your attraction and you will push him into this other woman’s arms. Ultimately, you are in a very, very complicated situation and quite honestly, it would be a good idea for you to seek help work with us.

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