So here’s the question. Why do men cheat in marriage? And you’re not just asking this question out of curiosity. This is happening to you and you want to know. Why how could he do this to me, right. I’m going to tell you. But more importantly. I’m going to tell you what you can do about it if you’re open. Not every woman. Is open to this. Many women go how dare he cheat on me, what’s wrong with him, he is a blah, blah, blah and they put all the blame on their husband. I’m not saying he’s innocent, don’t get me wrong. But they put all the blame. On their husband. They want to point out what a creepy is. How bad he is, how dare he how could he do this to me right now. A lot of those. Things are coming up in your mind and if they’re so strong. That you’re not going to be receptive. To what I have to say to you because what I have to say to you can change everything. It could it could be you just a wake up call if your husband is cheating on you, it could be the beginning of the best marriage in the world. If your husband is cheating on you. Because what has happened is it was either him cheating on you.
Relationship after infidelity
Are you giving up on your marriage? Your marriage was not working. It wasn’t the honest. Do you call arguing not having connection. Not feeling love, not feeling that joy of being together is that working, no, no marriage is supposed to produce unbelievable happiness every single day. Your happiness is supposed to get better. It doesn’t level off. This is a fallacy. That it hits a plateau. It does not hit a plateau when you know how to be married, you. It’s not like a tree that can only grow so big. It’s not like the sky that you can only go so high because a marriage is based on something that you forgot about. It’s based on love. Unconditional love ever expanding love. That’s what marriage is supposed to be founded upon. That’s the foundation. That’s where you’re supposed to live your marriage. Have you? No, obviously not. If you did. He wouldn’t have cheated on you. Impossible. You can tell me all you want that he’s a narcissist. He’s a this his mother did that his father did this. I don’t care. You know, we all have free will.
Can you recover after that?
So we live in the moment. We are habituated. We have habits that control us. But we still have free will and free will trumps our habits. Your husband cheated on you. Not why do men why did my husband cheat on me, guess what. And I don’t mean to be an a hole here and be so mean to you and harsh, but I’m trying to get your attention trying to get your attention because probably you have children and I don’t want them to be the product of a broken home. And your marriage can go in one of two okay, three directions right now it could start improving if you choose. To get some real guidance which I do offer in the form that I want to sell. I’m not going to go there you go to our website and see what we have. The marriage foundation dot org, but it could go up from here. Or it could go down to divorce. Or he could tell you, oh, honey, I’ll never do that again. I’m sorry. What a fool I was. And it’ll be in this twilight zone. Until he cheats again and he will guaranteed. I have never I’ve been doing this for over twenty years before this. I used to be a divorce mediator. So I’ve seen it all. Men who cheat. Until their wives change. Will cheat again. Now I know I’m going to get comments where women say. Oh yeah, you’re male oriented. You are chauvelin. You are misogynistic, no, I’m not I’m realistic. I deal with basic logic ideal with basic statistics I deal with basic. Principles, that’s what I deal with. I’m not a misogynist at.
You can bring him back
But I’m telling you right now. You can change everything around now. Is it your fault that he cheated, no, that is not what I’m saying and this is where people go wrong. They twist what I’m saying. Because I say you as a wife. Can bring your husband back in but into a better marriage. You can. And some people interpret that as well. Then you’re saying it was my fault. No, it was not your fault. That doesn’t mean you don’t have the power to turn it around. You know, that’s like being out on a sailboat. And. You’re out there with somebody. Your husband. And neither of you really know how to sale. And you turn the boat in such a way that the steel sales starts fluttering. And he was steering the boat. But he didn’t know any better. Is it his fault. That you’re not moving now because the sale is fluttering. It’s where your marriage is at, right sale is fluttering. You’re not going anywhere. You’re not making any progress. And he goes. I’ll fix this. Where you go. Let’s turn it around. You go I’ll fix this. Does that mean that it was your fault. That the sailboat stopped. No, it just means. You have the power to fix it. You have the power to fix your marriage in a way where he does not want to cheat. He wants to be with you. He wants to be with you all the time. He wants to love you. He wants to praise you. He wants to put you on a pedestal and treat you like a queen. That’s what you want in your marriage. He wants to appreciate you love you, tell you you’re beautiful. But how can you do that right now. The openings are not there for him if they were. He would not have cheated. It’s just common sense. You can fix this. Don’t buy into these people who tell you your husband’s a creep. A cheater is a cheater, will always none of that is true. Here is what is true. That men are simple creatures. Women are much more complex, but men are simple creatures. If they feel loved and nurtured. If they feel unconditional love. It’s irresistible and they won’t do anything. To screw that up. So promise to you now you’re thinking, oh, well, I’ll just change my behavior. I’ll do this. I’ll do that. Where do I find out what I have to do. It won’t work because what you really have to do. You see. Our behavior springs. From our thinking. Not our philosophies, our philosophy is different. But our thinking. How you see things, how you react to things habitually, we are comprised in a way our mind is comprised of a hundred thousand habitual thoughts and reactions. Now I call these triggers. Those triggers. React to outer circumstances or inner thoughts in a particular way. All of that combined is your thinking. Now if you have already subscribed to this channel, you know a lot about what I’m talking about. If not, you should subscribe. Or you should definitely go to the website, the marriage foundation dot org and learn about this. But your thinking has to change when your thinking changes. Your behavior changes and you’re not. Faking it, you’re real because you’ve changed your thing. I’ll give you an example. Okay. Your husband says, honey, I think you would look better. In this outfit. Some women will go. Oh, did you just call me fat. Really, there are some women who are so sensitive. To any kind of suggestion, they take it as an attack. That’s their thinking. Their thinking is a defensive thinking and they need to learn how to change that thinking. So instead of allowing their mind to react that way. With a defensive. Attack. They train their mind to be receptive to hearing this is just one tiny instance of what I’m talking about. Because you your mind is comprised of one hundred thousand of these and they need to be and they can be. I develop tools for this. They can be changed one at a time. And it builds up and builds up. You should see the testimonials. We. You should you should read them, you should go to the website and look at the reviews. So you understand from other people. Not paul the salesman and I’m not a salesman here. But other people who have said yeah done this amazing blah, blah, blah. Your husband is cheating on you. Because he’s unfulfilled. Doesn’t matter what he says, whether he’s going to do it or not, whether he blames you or not makes no difference. It doesn’t matter whether he stands up to you and tells you it’s your fault or whether he begs your forgiveness and says it will never happen. You can change your marriage into something phenomenal. You have that power. That’s what I want you to know. You have that power. I want you to get the happiness out of your marriage. I want you to get the love out of your marriage. It’s not too late. Your life isn’t what it has been. Your life is right now and into the future. That’s what your life is. Isn’t it to be honest.